Sometimes you just know it’s not going to work out as you wished. You had fallen for a terrible guy who knows the magical spells. He speaks nonsensical words in enchanting ways. You’re sure that he is a thug and one day he is going to run away with everything you have. His eyes are mysterious, they connote troubles already. But there is something about the way he smiles, it drains out those thoughts. To define his smile in words would defame the rest of the earthly smiles. He has got one of those smiles that fills your heart up and feels like a bliss. His smile is just the cure for all the unjust problems.
You can never feel the way he makes you to. Though you do know that it’s a situation where ‘Happily Ever After’ with him is nothing but an illusion. But then again, as long as the illusions exist you want to dwell and submerge into that one. Out of the billion wrongs he does, a single right is all that matters to you. The single right of making you feel good about yourself, making you to fall in love with yourself, believe in yourself, and that somehow equalises all his wrongs.
You know that you can feel his presence on those days when it rains or when it’s wintery. You see his shadow in places where you’ve been together. He has crept in. Inside of your head, he’s the one that sleeps and dances with your demons. He matures in the darkest corners of your heart. He has befriended your demons, he has loved them, cherished them. He accepts you as you are and not a single thing would he ever want to change about you. In this dynamic world of changing personalities he wants you to remain static.
You know that it may all be just in your head, maybe he’s not real, maybe it’s just the way you see him. Maybe you’ve constructed him with bits and pieces of all your favourite characters. Maybe he’s just a reflection of your expectations and the incarnation of your positive thoughts. There’s no future, no hope, nothing but love. The rational part of your mind knows everything that had been done and that’s been going on. Perhaps that is what being ‘Hopelessly in Love’ feels like. There is no going back. You feel hopeless and you are in love- all at the same time.